TOP DAWG

Just a quick note...I hate that spelling of "dog", but I had to get the "dawg" sound.

Anyways, I had a pretty interesting weekend, and I will start with X-Mas Eve at Target. (The stories that I tell are not in the right order.) Something that I found interesting, but others may not...I had an auctioneer come through my lane on X-Mas Eve. I always wear this very sparkly vintage necklace that I get tons of compliments and comments on and people are always telling me I should have it appraised. Well this guy comes through and told me that I had a "very nice necklace." I told him thanks and said, "I love vintage jewelry."
"So do I. I sell jewelry and accessories at auctions."
So I took off my necklace and had him look at it and he said it was a very nice piece, but not much more came out of that.

On X-Mas Eve at Target I also got hit on by a young black guy. I was finishing with another "guest" when he came to my lane. The first thing he said to me was, "I like the pink." As he said this, I could see him looking me up and down and I thought, "Fuck, I don't want to deal with this." (I blush really easily when guys hit on me and it's embarassing.) When I turned to him to start scanning, he got real close and said all "smooth-like", "Can I take you out sometime?"
Suddenly Tony popped into my head and told me, "Tell him you have a bf or that you're 17."
So I told the guy that I had a bf and he just jeered, "Is it serious? Has it been like...one month??"
I am such a bad liar and said, "No...it's been like 10 months..."
He just left saying that he'd be back to ask again. I'm "sure" he will.

The biggest story of that night though....everyone remember my "Ball Straps" story? Well, this is sort of like that. I had this older couple come through my lane; not older as in elderly but older as in like 40. The guy was joking around the whole time he was in my lane; he was just giving me a hard time and such. When they were turning to leave, he said to me, "You getting any toys for X-Mas?"
In my head, I'm thinking back to last year when I got a cutlery set, a coffee maker and a crock pot and I'm thinking of these items as the "adult" versions of toys, and so innocently I just blurted out, "Adult toys."
I realized my mistake right there...The guys eyes opened wide and he said, "Adult toys?!"
I tried in vain to save myself and said, "Yeah, like a crock pot!"
There was no hope for me; I could hear him laughing all the way out the door.

X-Mas Time?

It's 2:42 pm, and I just woke up just a little bit ago. I got off at about about 1 am last night and Target and met up with Tony in Uptown, where he was at his friend's house. It was his last night in town for today he left home for Pittsburgh. I didn't think we were going to be there too long, for he had to be at the airport around 8, but we didn't leave his friend's place until around 3:30. We ran to his place in downtown to get some things and then came back to Uptown to his uncle Mark's place. Tony was dead tired and was falling asleep on me just on the car ride. And then while he laid in bed, he had me go through his laundry and decide what he should bring. Tony got about an hour of sleep, while I got about 20 minutues worth. When the alarm went off, I had to shake and yell at him to wake up and then had to literally drag him out of bed to go take a shower.
So yeah, I got back from the airport and went to bed.

I'm not going home for X-Mas this year, which is how it was last year. But at least last year I was able to go home before AND after X-Mas to celebrate. At the beginning of December, a notice went up at Target that said no more time off would be granted for 16th Dec - 1st Jan. So there you go. I told my "Pa" that if I were able to get a couple days off then I might come down, but the schedule has not been so kind.
Oh well, I'll celebrate in January I suppose.

I've told a couple people to call me over the break; guess I'll see what happens with that.... I did get invited to an X-mas party for "people who have nowhere to go" by a guy that works overnight at Target. Heh...yeah, that would be interesting. Imagine: a naive 19-year old amongst beer drinking 30-year olds. Oh yes, I WILL fit right in. : )

Ball Straps?

So...I guess I'm famous at Target now. Here's why:

The other day I was working on the floor putting away stray. (Stray is what people return, leave in odd places, or decide they do not want at the register.) While on the floor, you're always approached by people asking you where something is and whatnot. This night I was working, I was approached by a man who wanted to know where something was. When he asked me where an item was, I could have SWORN he said "ball straps" and I was confused by this and for some reason, common sense just did not kick in and I said, "Ball straps?"
A guy that works on the floor, Muhammud, was right there and he turned and started laughing. As soon as "ball straps" left my mouth I realized the intensity of what I had said and started to laugh to. The guy smiles and says, "No, Mouse Traps."

Oh...

So, Muhammud had to tell him where the mouse traps were.

So I'm talking to Brian tonight, a guy who works on the salesfloor, as we're walking out to our cars and I said, "You want to hear a funny story?" Somewhere along the line, I said something about "ball straps" and he goes, "Oh, I already heard this story."
"From who?" Muhammud was the only one there.
Brian then asked if I was questioning who told him the story (which ended up being a guy named Pat) or if he knew who had said "ball straps." Brian claimed he did not know who it was that said "ball straps."
"It was me!" I shouted.
"That was you?! You're the infamous "ball strap" sayer??"

Yeah, so I guess the story has been going around the store, but my name is a mystery.

Funny.

Meh?

First off, check out my pictures!

For some weird reason, I got the whole weekend off at work; a very rare event indeed. I usually only have a couple days off a week and they usually never follow one another. But this week I was only scheduled for 30 hours and so I asked if I could come in on Sunday. And I did. It's weird, I always complain aboue never having time to myself and just time to sit around and do "Liz" stuff like reading and journaling. Hell, I don't always have enough time for studying. But yet when I get a day off, I feel like freaking out, just because it feels like I have nothing to do. I just can't focus and when I sit down to read I feel like I should be doing something like studying, but yet I don't feel like studying...it's annoying.

I went X-Mas shopping this weekend. "Fun." Gotta "love" spendin' money on others. Saturday night I headed over to Ian and Em's place since I haven't seen them in awhile, and I ended up going to a party with them. A guy that Ian goes to class with had the party at his little apartment. It was kind of funny because the three of us aren't exactly the "social butterfly" type and so were on the outskirts of the party for most of the time. Every now and then, someone who knew or recognized Ian would come up and start talking to us. While there, I had a beer from Ian and a glass of wine from Em...so nice of them to share. It felt good to drink and be at a party with them, just because that's the first time I actually went to a party with one of my brothers, excluding wedding receptions and such. It just felt good to venture into that territory.
Ian ended up leaving to go sledding with some of the people there. Em and I stayed back and took up residence on the couch and she got into a rave about how guys are assholes...which was very amusing for me and the spectators. After awhile, Em got impatient and we ventured out into the biting cold to get Ian, who fortunately was on his way back, and we left.

So nothing extradoarinary (sp?) happened, but I don't need anything special to keep me entertained and happy. : )

"UpDation"

Here is the updated story that I have written for Tony for his birtday, let me know what you think!

There once was a boy…

There once was a boy who lived in a land of plenty. His childhood days were sunny and warm and free from all bothers and worries. He lived with a loving family in a little grey house that stood atop a small hill. They lived in a little village surrounded by green, rolling hills that resembled a vast green ocean. The little village was untouched by the evils of the world; the villagers all lived within the safety of one another. Children were raised and most left once old enough to places far beyond eyes view into lands unknown to them. There, they began their new lives.
Day after day the boy would play in the misty green grass with his brother as they gazed out abroad the distant paths that scoured the hilly landscape. Blue skies laid like a blanket over them. At night he dozed safe in the warm embrace of his down blanket and dreamt of his future life beyond the hills.
But as the boy grew older, his days became darker. Nights became an inky black which even the strongest light could not penetrate and a dense fog settled itself in every crack and crevice in the village. Paths that crossed distant hills and far off lands, once seen by day, were now obscured by thick clouds that dragged themselves across a forlorn sky, blocking out the warming rays of the sun. The darkness was unheard of in the village, for none that lived had ever experienced it before. Children were kept indoors and shielded from the darkness and the evil that usually accompanies it. But the boy did not fare so well. Day after day, he watched through the kitchen window as the distant lands were swallowed up by the fierce sky. In losing sight of these lands, of these distant dreams, he felt his hopes trickling away.
In the wake of the darkness came demons who searched for the weak to consume and grow strong off of. Sensing weakness like a hunger, Demons came to visit the boy and instead of shutting them out, he invited them in. He was a vulnerable boy at this time in his life; with obscured paths on the horizon, he felt lost. Days became darker and melded into one another. The boy put off everything. No longer did he still gaze out with hope on the fogging hills to try and catch glimpses of what he had once been able to see, for he had lost interest in many things and his dreams began to wane. He let time slip slowly by without a thought. Family and friends looked on with worry and fear. But with his hood pulled up, he seemed untouchable to everyone.

His friends left to seek greater things in distant lands and his family grew. But the boy remained the same.

Then one day, the boy chanced a glance out the window for the first time in many years. With the world dark and his hope vanquished, he had never had the desire before. His world had grown far darker since he last remembered. He saw his reflection in the window and pulled down his hood to reveal his face. How much he had grown, how much he had never realized. He wanted to question that it was him. He touched his face and his fears were confirmed: it really was himself that he saw staring back. But there was something else that scared him. He could see the hint of his demons’ destruction within his face. It showed radiant in every line that had been furrowed into his youthful skin and in his dull and dying eyes. He seemed hollow; there was no hope nor future to be found. It now became apparent that his demons were slowly consuming him; he was only feeding them and making things all the worse. The boy was suddenly brought back to reality. His past childhood and adolescence flashed before his eyes. Days of sunshine that had turned to days of darkness; days of joy that had turned to days of numbing. He saw his friends leaving and himself remaining.
Suddenly, an anger arose within the boy; anger with himself for letting his world get so dark, for allowing life to just pass him by. He knew that staying here would not cause the fog to lift, nor for the clouds to part. He cast out his demons with a promise to himself, and shut the door on them.

The next morning, he left.

He traveled day and night, for they seemed to be just a continuum of one another; it seemed day never ended and night never began. He traveled with his hood pulled tight, for he felt utterly alone and at times hopeless. But he trudged on through the broken terrain of brambles and thorns with the feeling that this was the right thing to do. Upon sleep; he dreamed of lands he had once glimpsed as a child and he awoke each morning with renewed vigor and set out to seek such places.
One day the boy came upon a very tall hill with sides that seemed to stretch for miles. In the far distance of the sky, he could see its tones becoming lighter, even if only minutely, foreshadowing a hope of lands he dreamed of. He set out without hesitation and began to climb. The boy was weary and pantingwhen he finally reached the top, but the sight before him caused his breath to catch in his throat. He fell down on his knees and gaped at the beauty he saw before him. Miles and miles on he could see. In the far-off distance, he could see lands of deep green and skies of pearlescent blue. He threw back his hood and down the hill he began to descend.
With each passing day the sky turned a shade lighter. No longer was it an inky black, but instead a grand blue, and on into an amber orange. Every day gave promise of much more. Paths were clearer and there were more and more that he came upon. The grass became fuller and the flowers ever so vibrantly colored.
But the boy knew that this was still yet the beginning. There were many paths to take, more hills to climb. He knew he’d happen upon gullies and brambles, but he did not fear this. For whatever gully or bramble he came across, he knew there’d be greater sunshine and even more paths to follow. He kept his eyes locked on the distant horizon and took each step with an unwavering heart.

And now there is a boy, who is turning into a man; he’s crossing paths he once could not see, and never chancing a look back at the things that used to be.

Pictures!

Go here to see photos! I'll be updating it soon too!

Lame Jokes and Cruel People

I hung out with Josh the other night. He came over and we talked for awhile, and then Emily came home and gave him the grand tour of her bug "collection", which was fun. And then after that we watched my 10th anniversary dvd of Conan.
I would say that things went well. We had a lot of time to talk and just get to know eachother, and I'm so glad that that's over with! That's the one thing I kind of hate about meeting new people, now we can just hang out and know the basic foundation of one another.
I think that Josh likes me, and though I did say I had a crush on him, it's nothing I plan to pursue. Just with the way that I feel about Tony and our whole stupid situation that we're trying to correct, I don't really feel "dateable" at the moment.
Blah.
Josh is a cool guy; he's 23 and from Kansas. He's already been through school and I forgot the exact time...but he wants to work as like a DNR or related. He wears a loose brown and orange hot cocked to one side on his head ALL the time which is rather cute and he wears his hair a little long and messy. Definitely cute. He smokes...ciggerettes and pot...not so cute. He doesn't quite have the sense of humor I'm looking for; he laughs at my jokes but doesn't really join in and he makes some corny jokes sometimes. Oh well, I look forward to a friendship.

Aside from that, I had about the worst day of my life a couple days ago. To start out, I had a major breakdown in the morning which Tony was witness to. I just felt really upset with some things that are going on between us and just little things in my own life. He was there to hug me and talk to me and I got through it. At 3 I had to be at my creative writing class to read my writing about Tony to the whole class. I almost didn't go since I had felt so upset, but I went. Tony waved me off with a "good luck" and I trudged into the class feeling confident. I read the paper and felt good about it, especially since I had made some changes to it which I felt were definite improvements. But when I got done reading it, the class was just dead silent and no one seemed to want to comment on it. People looked down as sparse comments were made about how my piece was too vague. No one really had anything to offer and I just felt like complete shit.

Oh well. They can all eat my ass.

Pathetic Now?

I finally grew balls and did it. I saw that Josh was working tonight, but was confused if it would be him or not. There are two different overnight Josh's and I saw that this one was coming in at 9. When 9 neared, my heart began to race and I just felt so overwhelmingly nervous! But 9 passed with no sign of Josh. It wasn't until 9:30 that he came in, just when I thought I could be calm for the rest of the night. At the sight of him and that little brown and orange hat he wears, my heart started to drum once more. He walked by my lane and I noticed him looking at me as he took off towards the back room. I thought I was done for the night; he hadn't come through my lane and I wouldn't be able to take that chance and ask him to hang out. While putting away stray (stuff that people decided they didn't want and we have to put back) tonight, I saw him pulling out carts of items to be stocked. I was working in the market area, when suddenly he showed up. I was walking into an aisle when he passed by and I noticed him turn his head to look at me. (God...this is so middle-school!) As I went back to the cart to grab some items, I said "hi" to him as he walked by. "Hi Liz." He replied. This caught me by surprise that he said my name for we had never introduced one another before. Granted I wear a nametag, but it's cool that he took note to it.
I grabbed some soup to put away and then noticed to my delight, and nervousness, that he was stocking the shelves in that aisle. I walked in there, he looked up and smiled at me, and right away I said, "Alright, this is coming out of nowhere but I've been wanting to ask for a long time. Do you want to hang out sometime?"
"Sure." He said.
"You got a cell phone on you?" I asked.
He didn't, so he gave me his number, told me to call it so he had my number, and said that he'd call me sometime. After that we started to small talk a bit and I found out that he's from Kansas.

Oh, I was just in such a good mood after that!

Pathetic

So, I knew Josh was working tonight...remember, the overnight guy I've got a wee crush on? I got done with work at 8:30 and knew he was coming in at 9:00. I was talking to Kenny about him, a guy who works on the sales floor and who used to work nights and knows Josh, and he was telling me I should wait in the break room until Josh got there. When I got off of work, I decided to do this, even though I felt like throwing up. I was blushing just at the sheer thought at what I was about to do. In the break room, I noticed a humongous coffee thermos and knew that this overnight guy that I talk to every now and then was there, so when he showed up, I sat down and talked to him about old video games and tv for a 1/2 hour. 9:00 came and the overnight people made ready to clock in. Josh had not come yet and instead of sitting alone and looking like I was waiting for someone, I decided to leave, hoping that he'd be walking in just as I was leaving. He didn't though... It wasn't until I got on my bike that I noticed a person walking in that looked like him. Oh blah.

And Out of Nowhere...

Bad Bad me...I haven't been blogging lately. I'm almost at the tail end of working 7 days in a row at Target, Tuesday will be my 7th day.

Blah.

Oh well, it's good money, and I definitely need money. A few weeks ago, I got pulled over for the first fucking time...for speeding on University. The PO-lice man explained that I was only getting a citation, so it wouldn't be affecting my license or insurance, it would just wind up costing me $140.

"Joy."

I went home the weekend of Halloween and went to a little house party with Jay, Rachel, and her new boy-toy named Jake. I went with a vintage look; I wore a black dress, pearls, black heels, a fur wrap-around, and a vintage gangster hat. I wanted to get wasted, but failed to do so as I had a splitting headache and was tired.

Some INTERESTING news...found out that my ex-bf had a 3-some with a girl and guy in which he and the other guy both fucked the girl at the same time...and in the same place... Yeah. And now he claims he's bisexual and is in a relationship with the guy he had the 3-some with.

He just doesn't know he's completely gay yet.

What else...well, I have this crush on a guy that works overnight at Target. His name is Josh and I've been told he's already gone through school. Yeah, and he's working overnight at Target? It happens. I've spoken to him a few times, just said some dumb and sarcastic things. The other night he came through my lane and I was litterly shaking. I don't know how to approach this whole thing. I think he knows I'm interested, and he responds well when I talk to him; he laughs and all that good shit. He's come through my lane twice...am I just supposed to ask, "So...want my number?" It's beginning to kill me!

Supposedly I have a stalker at school, though he has failed to stalk me very well. I'm still waiting for him to show himself.

Isn't it Ironic?

Don't you think?

Scalin' A Building

The other night Tony and I hung out. We were biking to my place and going through downtown. I had my digital camera with me and we kept stopping to take pictures of the buildings around us. At one point, we turned off of Nicolet and headed up to Hennepin, when Tony started biking up a ramp into a parking garage. I followed along and we went up to the top floor of the parking garage. As I stood atop a ledge and made ready to start snapping pictures, Tony yelled out, "Wait!"
He pointed to this apartment building next to us that was probably around 8 stories high and there on the side was a staircase that went all the way to the top of the building. "We have to go up there." Tony said.
We took the spiraling exit down a couple floors and locked our bikes to this chain link fence that was set up in the space between the two levels of the garage. There was a locked door that opened to the platform of the stairs, but as it was locked, we had to think of another way to get over there. I climbed onto the concrete ledge and swumg myself over onto the other side of the fence, walking precariously above the ground, two stories up. I could get my foot over to the platform, but there was this square piece of concrete that was jutting out of a corner that I couldn't get my arm to wrap around to grab the other side of the fence. I had to retreat defeated. Then Tony went and was able to swing himself over to the platform, and from there he opened the door for me. We climbed up the stairs and then climbed the ladder to the roof of the building. It was so great! We were able to sit on the ledge and take pictures of Hennepin at night. We also watched as some people met up on the top floor of the parking garage to do beer bongs. On the way down, a guy that was in a parking lot near the parking garage walked over to a corner of the building we were climbing down from and proceeded to pull down his pants and start peeing. I found this highly amusing and stood a story above him and watched and I waited until his friend saw me and then I waved.
"Hey, that girl saw your penis!" His friend yelled.
Heh, I just started laughing.

Tony and I have further plans for climbing buildings.
I really should put my pictures online.

12 Year Reunion

I was biking over the Hennepin bridge on my way to class today when suddenly a felt a nasty stinging sensation on my right leg as though I had been bitten or pierced with a needle. I think I saw something flying away with black wings, but didn't see what actually stung me, I just knew it hurt really bad. I had a red dot where it happened and began to swell pretty quickly. I had not been stung since I was around 7 or so and so I didn't really remember what it felt nor looked like. I called up my mom and asked, "What does it look like when you get stung?"
By the time I got to school, about 5 inches of my leg had turned red and was swollen and I had a "safety guy" come and take me from class to clean up my leg. I thought the swelling might get intense, but as I sat in class, it slowly went away.
It just worried me for I knew that I used to be allergic to bee and wasp stings, but since I never got stung as I was older, I had no idea how I was going to react. But it's going away on it's own...it still aches and such but the swelling has gone down and the redness is disapating.

Blah, stupid wasp or bee...or whatever the hell it was.

Ok...?

So no one has any comments about woofing? No one checked it out and is giving their opinion on whether they like the idea or not?

Other than that, I got locked out of my house for an hour yesterday. It sucked. I had gotten up early to go jogging. Emily was still asleep when I left but I could hear her alarm clock going off and so I sent her a text saying, "Do not lock the door, I'm jogging." About 20 minutes later, I hadn't received a reply and so I resent the message and then I got, "I already left!"
She hadn't seen my first text for she had been asleep. I told her to have her bf Matt come let me in for he has a key and only lives a few blocks away. She told me she had called him and that he'd be there in about 15 mintues and I told her to have him just unlock the door and leave. I get home about 15-20 minutes later and the doors are locked and he's not there. I wait 15 minutes and I'm calling Emily to tell her that he's not there and I don't see him coming down the road. She calls his house to find out that he has already left. I wait, and still no sign of Matt. So Matt didn't come and Emily ended up having to call her mother to come let me in, and I waited outside in the "cold" in only shorts and a tank top for an hour. It sucked.

Better news, I got my camera last night; a canon-a80. I find that I just can't stop taking pictures now. But that's how it always is with new things. When I first got my cell phone, I was almost walking into walls because I just couldn't stop playing with it. And now it's my best bud.

A'WOOFING we will go...

Tony and I may have found our ticket to Italy!

While Tony was working at Lund's the other night, a girl who had done this was sent to talk to him by one of his coworkers who knew Tony was looking for a way to get to Italy. He got the address to the site from her and we checked it out the other night and it's like a dream come true. It'll be nice for before Tony talked of us getting an apartment in Rome which I felt a bit hesitant about as it'd just cost so much money and we'd still have to find a job on top of that. With this we will have accomadation AND a job.

How awesome will it be to say, "Yeah...I'm going to be living in Italy and working on a farm this summer."

"Moving"

With my influence, Tony has decided that he wants to move overseas with me for the summer. We both really want to live in Italy as we have both been and just loved the place. We also thought about maybe going to Ireland, since they actually speak English there.
Tony has cousins in Italy...and so maybe we have a connection there for a place to stay. Anyone have advice or know of a site to check out where I can get information about moving to Europe for the summer?

Oh Yeah

Scary...

The other day, Tony sent me an e-mail of something he had written while sitting in Loring Park. I could not believe what I was reading. I mean...see any resemblence between his little writing and my story?? Tony knows that I have written a story that I will not allow him to read, but that's as far as he knows about it. And I wrote it like three weeks ago, this is only two days old...

"TODAY, PARADISE"
As I walk this path, It guides me through paradise. Paradise that is separated into smaller paradises by an endless number of rolling hills, that I cannot see beyond. When I ascend to the top of one hill, I am warmed by sunlight, and can see new grass covered hills, and I am happy. When I descend into the valley between two hills I emerse into the shade of a new tree, and am surrounded by vibrant vegetation that outlines my path, and I am happy then too. The wind brings a different scent each time it comes, and a new thought is remembered. I realize that paradise is not only around me but also inside me everytime I breath, or take in these placid visions. My paradise is nothing more thatn a walk in the park on a sunny day.

Hills that he cannot see beyond? Hills that he climbs and he sees sunshine? Vibrant vegetation?

The First Revision

Here is the revision of my story that I presented to my creative writing class. Well, to two people in my class anyways. The guy who was in my group said that he really liked the story; he liked the way the environment reflected what was going on with the boy. He liked the little vagueness for anyone who reads the story could make it their own.

I have also put it on here for my friend Rachel should be coming to the site soon to read it, and I'm just trying to get as much feedback as possible.

There once was a boy who lived in a land of plenty. His childhood days were sunny and warm and full of many things to do. He lived with a loving family in a little brown house atop a small hill that overlooked the surroundings lands that resembled a vast green ocean. Day after day he’d play in the misty green grass with his brother and there never seemed to be a cloud in the sky.
But as the boy grew older, his days became darker. Nights were an inky black which even the strongest light could not penetrate. Paths that crossed distant hills and far off lands, once seen by day, were now obscured by thick clouds that dragged themselves across a forlorn sky, blocking out the warming rays of the sun.
Demons came to visit the boy and instead of shutting them out, he invited them in. He was a vulnerable boy at this time in his life. With obscured paths on the horizon, he felt lost. The demons kept him locked inside, not only within his house, but also within his mind. Days became darker and they meddled into one another. The boy put off everything. No longer did he still gaze out on the fogging hills to try and catch glimpses of what he had once been able to see, for he had lost interest in many things and his dreams had waned. He let time slip slowly by and without a thought. Others looked on with fear, family and friends. But with his hood pulled up, he seeemed untouchable to everyone.

His friends left to seek greater things, his family grew, but the boy remained the same.

Then one day, the boy chanced a glance out the window; his world had grown far darker since he last remembered. He saw his reflection in the window and pulled down his hood to reveal his face. How much he had grown, how much he had never realized. He touched his face and his fears were confirmed: it really was himself that he saw staring back. But there was something else that scared him. He could see the hint of his demons within his face. It now became apparent that they were slowly consuming him; he was only feeding his demons and making things worse.
Suddenly an anger arose within the bo;, anger with himself for letting his world get so dark, for allowing life to just pass him by. He cast out his demons and shut the door on them.

The next morning, he left.

He traveled day and night, for they seemed to be just a continuum of one another; it seemed day never ended and night never began. He traveled with his hood pulled tight for he felt utterly alone and at times hopeless.
But he trudged on with the feeling that this was the right thing to do. Upon sleep he dreamed of lands he had once glimpsed as a child and he awoke each morning with renewed vigor and set out to seek such places.
One day the boy came upon a very tall hill with sides that stretched out for miles. In the far distance of the sky, he could see its tones becoming lighter, even if only minutely, foreshadowing a hope of lands he dreamed of. He set out without hesitation and began to climb, and when he finally reached the top, he fell down on his knees and gaped at the beauty he saw before him. Miles and miles on he could see. In the far-off distance, he could see lands of deep green and skies of pearl blue. He threw back his hood and down the hill he began to descend.
With each passing day the sky turned a shade lighter. No longer was it an inky black, but instead a grand blue, and then an amber orange. Every day gave promise of much more. Paths were clearer and there were more and more that he came upon. The grass was fuller and the flowers ever so vibrantly colored.
But yet the boy knew that this was still yet the beginning. There were many paths to take, more hills to climb. He knew he’d happen upon gullies and brambles. But fear this, he did not. For whatever gully or bramble he came across, he knew there’d be brighter sunshine and even more paths to follow. He kept his eyes locked on the distant horizon in front of him and took each step with an unwavering heart.

And now there is a boy, who is turning into a man; he’s crossing roads he once could not see, and never chancing a look back at the things that used to be.

Hate

I hate being so young.

I hate having feelings.

I hate that I'm sensitive and insecure.

I hate that I can't just let things be as they are.

I hate...

I just need to rant.